Empowering Your Teen: Through the Low Self-Esteem Crisis

Every phase of parenting is challenging. Pregnancy, newborn, toddler years, pre-school, kindergarten, middle school… Each phase comes with its own unique set of challenges that seem more complex than the phase before. But the teen years are a whole new level of parenting when you learn that empowering your teen is essential to helping them succeed.

Helping Your Child Succeed Through Every Phase

When my daughter was a newborn, I would count the days until she was one month old, then two months old, and then three months old. I looked forward to every milestone, her first giggle, first crawl, and wobbly first steps. This precious baby girl meant the world to me, and I took all the steps to help her, and then her younger siblings thrive.

Homemade baby food, a warm, cozy home, organic teething necklaces, and natural baby shampoo. I was eager to give my children the best chances in life. Fast forward to now, my oldest is in the infamous, overwhelming yet beautiful teen years, and my other babies are quickly approaching.

Just as with every other phase of parenting, the teen years seem to be the new phase that is the toughest. After years of providing the best for my little ones to succeed in life, we hit the teen years. The years I was indeed not prepared for.

Learning How to Parent a Teen

I remember thinking to myself when my daughter was a newborn that I wished she had come with a manual. The nights full of crying because of her colic would leave me feeling like I wasn’t doing something right. Fast forward to now, and I often have that same feeling. Throughout my children’s childhoods, I felt a duty to continually build their confidence, repeating phrases like “You’re amazing, smart, talented, beautiful inside and out, and so kind.” I hoped these bids of confidence-boosting phrases would guide them through the teen years. I suffered immensely from low self-esteem as a teenager, and so, from the time my babies were born, I would do everything I could to build them up. As I never wanted them to feel as low as I did.

I quickly learned that even with the confidence-boosting phrases, the hugs and cuddles, the deep conversations and the ability to drop everything when my kids need me, that self-confidence can be built up throughout their childhood but quickly degraded when they hit their teen years.

The Low Self-Esteem Epidemic Among Teens

We often classify physical sickness as epidemics when there is an outbreak of illnesses. Indeed, a disease that would affect 1 in 3 teenagers would be classified as a pandemic. The entire world shut down in 2020 for much lower statistics than these. Yet, we overlook a severe phenomenon among teenagers today. Low self-esteem among teenagers is a widespread, deeply rooted issue affecting a large portion of the world’s youth. As such, this comes with significant mental health and societal consequences.

The Self-Esteem Crisis:

There is a massive scale of teenagers struggling.
- Studies show that 1 in 3 to 1 in 2 teens struggle with low self-esteem. This represents millions of teens facing confidence issues daily, and many of them facing this crisis along.
The rising trends.
- Anxiety, depression, and self-harm rates (which are typically linked to self-esteem issues) have skyrocketed, particularly since the rise of social media.
There is a widespread impact:
- Low self-esteem affects so many aspects of your teen’s life. Their academic performance, relationships, risk-taking behavior and even their physical health can all be impacted.
Low self-esteem is rooted in societal and technological changes.
- Unlike generations before, today’s teens face constant comparison with their peers, not just at school, but the minute they open their social media apps. This, mixed with cyberbullying, is a recipe for disaster.
Low self-esteem has long-term consequences:
- Studies suggest that low self-esteem in adolescence is directly correlated with higher rates of depression, poor job prospects and relationship difficulties in adulthood. It’s not just a phase that they will “grow out of”; it’s a concerning trend that can negatively impact their future.

How Did it Get SO Bad?

It hits you like a shockwave when you realize that your teen, the one that you’ve poured so much love into, is, in fact, struggling with low self-esteem. I don’t know about you, but when I look at my teenager, I still see the little girl she was. And my heart hurts to think that my sweet little girl can struggle to feel adequate in a world of filters and fakeness. Despite all the love and positive reinforcement throughout the years, low self-esteem can still make your child a victim.

What can be done? How can we guide our teens through these challenging years? How do you prioritize empowering your teen?

Helping Teens with Low Self-Esteem:

Here is a quick list of steps to support your teen who is struggling with low self-esteem.

Encourage Open Conversations
- Let your teen know their feelings are valid and heard.
- Instead of rushing to fix things, ask, ‘How can I support you?’. I get how hard this is. As parents, we always work to help and fix things for our children, but right now, they need support and guidance so they can make it through this.
Teach and Demonstrate Healthy Self-Task
- Help your teen replace negative thoughts with empowering affirmations (like in the Teen Empowerment Pack).
- An excample of this: instead of “I’m not good enough,” we say “I am learning and growing every day.”
Address and Shine a Light on Social Media’s Impact
- Encourage your teen to have a healthy relationship with social media.
- Help them recognize curated content vs. real life and take intentional breaks from social media.
Praise Your Teens Effect, Not Just Results
- Instead of focusing on your teens achievements, celebrate their progress, persistence and personal growth.
Offer Tools to Build Confidence
- The free Teen Empowerment Pack includes affirmations, journal prompts and exercises to help teens reframe self-doubt into confidence.
- You can download the Teen Empowerment Pack for free by clicking here to help your teen start their journey toward self-belief.

Having a Teen with Low Self-Esteem Doesn’t Mean You Failed as a Parent

It’s easy to feel like you’ve failed as a parent when your teen is struggling with low self-esteem. You’ve spent years pouring love, encouragement, and positive affirmations into them, only to watch them doubt themselves or struggle to see their worth. It can feel very disheartening, almost like everything you’ve built is slipping away in a moment.

But let me reassure you: you haven’t failed. Your love, guidance, and presence still matter more than you know. Even when they push back, roll their eyes, or seem distant, everything you’ve instilled in them is still there, shaping them beneath the surface. Your words of affirmation are not lost; they are seeds planted, waiting for the right time to grow.

Adolescence is a season of self-discovery, comparison, and deep emotions, and sometimes, even the most loved and supported teens struggle with self-worth. But the fact that you notice their pain, that you care enough to worry, means you are already the parent they need. Keep showing up. Keep reminding them of their strength, their worth, and their purpose. You are making a difference, even when you can’t see it yet.

The Genuine Mom